An Adventure in the Every Day

Day 1, I often say "onto the next adventure". But I'm always talking about a vacation, something outdoors or maybe something I've never done before. But, not every adventure has to be of the Indiana Jones Sort. I need to find the adventure in the every day. I've become numb and complacent. I am happy when good things happen. More so when good things happen to my kids. But I've lost my internal joy. It's gone. Gone in my personal inadequacies and shortcomings of which I catalog daily. My internal voice that I'm pretty sure hates my guts. I feel a hamster on a wheel. My passions have waned. I feel like an empty shell of not good enough. Is this feeling at 44 the way I should continue for the next 44. NO, there's not exclamation mark but No none the less. Yesterday I was watching Katie with my mom. There were two parents talking about the death of their beautiful daughter. They put a book together of her essays. The one that resonated the most was called "The Opposite of Loneliness" I immediately bought the book on my NOOK. So tonight with my hair in a cap, sitting under my dryer chair I read it. It's only three little pages bit they had a BIG message. It's never too late. I want my kids to read this. They hate reading so I may have to tie them down, but I'm not above it. then into the bath I went. As the bubbles were dissolving I kept thinking of the essay. How can it apply to me? Then out of the blue, like a gift, this idea popped into my head. I'm starting tonight. I'm not waiting or I may not do it. This is my year long adventure into the every day. Joy in every day. Purpose in every day. Whether I'm taking care of my family, house or me. I will find the adventure in the little things. Will this bring me back to the land of the living? I sure hope so. Can I do this for a whole year? (with Gods gift of perservarance and strength) Can I re-ignite the passionate, loving, joyful person I've lost? That's my greatest wish. There are two songs that are motivating me today. Monty Pythons: Always look on the bright side of life: Some things in life are bad They can really make you mad Other things just make you swear and curse When you're chewing on life's gristle Don't grumble, give a whistle And this'll help things turn out for the best... And... ...always look on the bright side of life... Always look on the light side of life... If life seems jolly rotten There's something you've forgotten And that's to laugh and smile and dance and sing When you're feeling in the dumps Don't be silly chumps Just purse your lips and whistle - that's the thing. And...always look on the bright side of life... Come on. Always look on the right side of life... For life is quite absurd And death's the final word You must always face the curtain with a bow Forget about your sin - give the audience a grin Enjoy it - it's your last chance anyhow. So always look on the bright side of death... (Whistle) a-Just before you draw your terminal breath... (Whistle) Life's a piece of shit, when you look at it Life's a laugh and death's a joke, it's true You'll see its all a show, keep 'em laughin as you go Just remember that the last laugh is on you And... Always look on the bright side of life... Always look on the right side of life... C'mon Brian, cheer up Always look on the bright side of life... Always look on the bright side of life... Worse things happen at sea you know. I mean - what have you got to lose? You know, you come from nothing - you're going back to nothing. What have you lost? Nothing. Always look on the right side (I mean) of life... what have you got to lose? You know, you come from nothing - you're going back to nothing. What have you lost? Always (Nothing.) look on the right side of life... Nothing will come from nothing ya know what they say? Cheer up ya old bugga c'mon give us a grin! There ya go, see! Always look on the right side of life... (Cheer up ya old bugga c'mon give us a grin! At same time) There ya go, see! The next song is "Ordinary Life" by Chad Brock (and I don't even like country) Shelly's at the kitchen table, cup of coffee the morning paper When he walks in she's so surprised to see the tears in his eyes He says, "I love you, I'm so sorry, but bigger dreams are waiting for me But I can't do this anymore Pay the bills, watch TV, day in, day out the same routine Mow the grass, fix the leak, just to fix it again We go to church, go to work, so picture perfect that it hurts I feel like I'm trapped inside this ordinary life" Shelly's at the kitchen table, crayons, construction paper "Hey Mom, look what I drew, it's a picture of me and you" And later when he says his prayers, she runs her fingers through his hair So thankful for every day They pay their bills, watch TV, day in, day out, it's all they need Mow the grass, fix the leak, just to fix it again They go to church, go to school, everyday it's something new Precious are the days as they go by in their ordinary life Phone rings, he's calling from the airport It's midnight, he's all alone again He says, "I can't believe how much I've missed And what I wouldn't give To pay the bills, watch TV, day in, day out the same routine Mow the grass, fix the leak, just to fix it again Go to church, go to work, I can't tell you how this hurts I miss my son, I miss my wife and my ordinary life" Today's adventure has just begun.......